When you run a race, the hardest part is often when the finish line is almost in sight.
After all, you’ll be celebrating just on the other side of that tape! But in the meantime—huff, puff!—it’s downright HARD pushing past that “end-of-marathon” exhaustion and pain.
It’s the same way in life and marriage. Persevering through a dry, difficult, and discouraging season is excruciating. But to quit means losing or forfeiting the “race.” 🙁
But maybe you feel as if . . .
As a life coach, that’s sadly something I hear a LOT! And I actually cringe inwardly every time I hear it!
Perhaps you feel like quitting would be the most humane way to handle a dysfunctional marriage for everyone involved.
Hear me weary friend! I can totally understand why you would feel that way. You just want the pain to stop!
Been there . . . felt that.
But what if what you’re really doing is making how you FEEL in this season paramount to your word, your example, and most importantly, to honoring God?
Sorry about that! Did I just hit you up side the head!
I certainly know that there are situations where this is not the only, the main, or even the true reason for throwing in the towel on a marriage. If that’s you, then please ignore my head bop! 😉
All I’m trying to say is what the word of God already says . . . at least about life.
If you are a “Christian feeling trapped in a bad marriage” (or bad life, for that matter), then realize that you actually did sign up for this—maybe not for the “bad marriage” part, but for the difficulty and pain in life.
Consider Jesus’ words,
“. . . Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world.” ~John 16:33b
The truth is, pain is a bitter pill that we all must swallow in every area of our lives, since we live in a fallen world and are dysfunctional and faulty people.
With that said, let me focus on Jesus’ “good news” for the rest of this post. 🙂
I’m a stubborn and often unyielding girl at heart—my husband will testify! But I’ve learned through the school of hard knocks, and most of all through the gentle refinement of the Holy Spirit, that surrendering to God is the best and fastest way to FEEL encouraged even in the middle of the most painful and discouraging moment in marriage/life.
Let’s refer to Jesus’ words once again . . .
“. . . ‘Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me will find it.’” ~Mt. 16:24-25
This is another one of those bad news, good news statements from Jesus.
We cannot experience the “life”—actually Christ’s abundant life (John 10:10b)—unless we surrender our lives, as well as our desires, hopes and dreams at His feet. He then takes our brokenness and exchanges them for His forgiveness, peace, comfort and love.
Of course, surrendering doesn’t mean that God will necessarily change your spouse . . . but it does mean He will change you!
That’s because when you are surrendered to Him . . .
- You focus on being grateful for the blessings He constantly gives, which generates contentment and joy. Just try being grateful and sad at the same time! 😉
- Your desires change from what you can get, to what you can give out of the abundance you experience. In fact . . .
- Your source of love and joy is found in the Lord, rather than in yourself. God’s love miraculously overflows from your heart over onto your mate. And that’s the best kind of love, because all three of you (including God) are blessed by God’s endless supply of love!
Click on the link, if you’d like to read more in this series on “Persevering in the Lord.”
Can you add another blessing to my list from being surrendered to God?
What is the hardest part for you regarding persevering in your painful life/marriage?
Linking up with these fine blogs – Making Your Home Sing, Moments of Hope, Mondays @ Soul Survival, Word of God Speak, Spiritual Sundays, Carolina @ Cisneros Cafe, Sitting Among Friends, Family, Friendship and Faith, and DanceWithJesusFriday