Grace Filled Marriage Book Review & Giveaway!

Grace Filled MarriageA while back I was asked to read, review and giveaway one copy of Dr. Tim Kimmel’s book, Grace Filled Marriage. So I packed my copy in my carry-on bag, taking it with me on our trip to England and Wales. It became my constant welcome companion on the British rail, while the beautiful English countryside rushed past me in the window. <sigh>

I’ve often felt that what I need most to give to my husband and receive from my Lord in marriage, is not love, is not even necessarily respectalthough those are both amazing and essential gifts we must offer our spouses daily!

Instead, I’ve often felt compelled toward graceseeing how God’s grace is so very vital to sustaining my love and respect for my hubby as well as my own sense of hopefulness in my marriage.

Dr. Kimmel fleshes this truth out, reminding us of the way God works through a grace filled marriage by stating it’s the “missing piece” in many marriages. He uses Christ’s example of grace toward us as the standard for which to evaluate our own actions, feelings and motives toward our spouse.

I totally agree and resonated with this so much!

No where in this book does Dr. Kimmel try to encourage us toward self-effort, but rather toward God-surrender. We can’t love or respect our spouses without God’s grace flowing through us and giving us the ability.

Here’s one of my favorite quotes from the book:

“Our power to endure is found in the gracious work of Jesus on our behalf. When we let his grace transform our hearts, that grace will serve us well, especially when we face the reasons that many use as excuses for giving up. And the more we endure, the greater our resolve to get to the finish line.”

Now I don’t want you to think this is simply a book on theology or philosophy. Dr. Kimmel also shows us how to receive and practice the expression of grace in very practical ways. He discusses much about how grace transforms and elevates our communications with our spouses. I’m always working on this area in my marriage and was convicted by the author’s reminder of how to “speak the truth in love” as well as to balance that with compassion, forgiveness and selfless giving.

You and I certainly can’t do ALL that on our own! 

I’m going to be sharing more of my favorite quotes from Grace Filled Marriage that caught my eye in the days and weeks to come on Twitter and Facebook. So if you’re interested in hearing more and aren’t already a follower/fan of mine, please connect with me at the following links: Twitter, my personal Facebook account, and  my Messy Marriage Facebook page.

And if you’d like to win, Grace Filled Marriage, please comment below by noon on Sunday, Nov. 3rd and you’ll be entered in the random-generated giveaway. I’ll announce the winner in my Monday post.

One more request and FYI: please pray for me on my recent diagnosis. If you are unaware, you can read about it here. And a special “thank you” to all of you who’ve already expressed your love and committed to pray for me! You’re all such a blessing in my life!

Dr. Tim Kimmel is the founder and executive director of Family Matters. Dr. Kimmel is the author of 14 books on relationship, speaks around the world, and equips parents and churches with the Grace Based Parenting Conference. Check out his website – Family Matters and “like” the Family Matters Facebook page to receive additional updates.

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Joining with NOBH, Works for Me Wednesday, To Love Honor and Vacuum, Wisdom Wednesday, Whimsical Wednesday and Wholehearted Wednesday

Now, it’s time for Wedded Wednesday!

WW rules:

Write in any way you feel inspired about marriage, parenthood or anything that is spiritually encouraging.

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Optional but encouraged:

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  2. If you have the time, visit those who visit your blog and comment at their place as well … sort of a “Say it forward.”
Come join our Wednesday Link-up!

  • mmm … 3 Easy Steps To Do This or 6 Ways To Do That? Easy Peasy! Grace? NOW we’re talking. Faith. Maturity. No quick fixes. Heart change. A whole recalibration of who we are and how we relate.
    Help us, Jesus! Please.

    • That’s right, Linda, “easy peasy!” And the funny thing is, when we let God’s grace flow it’s “easy peasy” for Him to do the work that’s needed to reignite our love in our marriages. But yes, recalibration on who we are and how we relate is the hard part for sure! Thanks for your encouragement, my friend!

  • Andrea

    Sounds like a good book. 🙂

    • Yes, one that I’m sure you’d like and gain insight from, Andrea! Thanks for stopping by!

  • JosephPote

    Grace! Yes!
    In regard to prayers related to my marriage relationship, this one tops my list. Asking God to give me more grace for my wife…asking Him to give her more grace for me…asking her to have grace for my annoying habits or grumpy attitudes…
    It really is all about Grace, and it really does have to come from Him!
    Thanks for sharing, Beth!

    • Yes, grace is one of those things I long for God to infuse in my heart and my actions, but I often settle for the counterfeit of being nice or trying harder and they both fail miserably! 🙂 Thanks for stopping by and entering the giveaway, Joe! I hope you received your book from the last giveaway!

      • JosephPote

        “…I often settle for the counterfeit of being nice or trying harder…”
        Very insightful words, Beth! Yes, true grace is so much more than just trying to please. That’s a trap I too often fall into, as well.
        Yes, I did receive your book gift from the last giveaway. Thank you, so much!

  • Thank you so much for hosting your linkup party. If anyone has had a very messy marriage, it has been me. I think that is because I had such a mess to clean up. Anyhow, even though I have been married for years and years, I would love to read this book because there is always room to grow in grace (I like that) in my marriage with my dear hubby.

    • Yes, Judith, I had the same problem–brought the baggage of my parent’s bad marriage with me into my own. It’s taken most of my lifetime to learn how to surrender it to God and let Him do a new work in me and my marriage. It truly was a great read and one I would recommend to any blogger who blogs on marriage from time to time. 🙂

  • Thanks for the review, I sure would like to win a copy. I sure am praying for you Beth, thanks for hosting us and have a super blessed day!
    Love

    • If I had it my way, you’d all win something just for stopping by, sweet Ugochi! But even if you don’t win it, I hope you’ll get a copy on your own. It really is worth the effort and money for those of us who blog on marriage. Well, it’s worth it even if you don’t blog on marriage! 🙂

  • Mia

    Dear Beth
    Oh I don’t think any marriage can truly be happy unless the grace of God is the glue that keeps it all together. To love like Pappa wants us to love our husbands and Himself for that matter, we first need to be filled with His love and grace to such an overflow that it just spills over to our husbands. Only then can we also have a balanced respect for ourselves as well and that us just as vital ingredient for a happy marriage. Praying for you, dear friend, every day. Please keep us up to date with how things are going.
    Blessings XX
    Mia

    • That’s so true. The grace of God is like the “glue” that holds us together and bonds us to our Savior as well! Thanks for your prayers, Mia! I can feel them and am so blessed to have you and others lifting me up all over the globe! How cool is that?! 🙂

  • rboerner

    Love free book time! 🙂 Self-effort vs. God surrender! Learning every day that my own efforts may work for a while but they definitely aren’t long term or lasting. Surrendering to God every day, every hour, and sometimes every second is when I get to experience His grace. Praying for you daily!

    • Yes, this really fit well with what we talked about last night, doesn’t it, Becky? I suppose it’s an important attribute of God that we all need to receive and believe in. Thanks for coming by and entering the giveaway … oh, and encouraging me as well!

  • Amy Anderson

    I absolutely agree that grace is incredibly important in marriage. This book sounds great. Thank you for your ministry here.

    • Yes, it really is one of my favorite marriage books, Amy. I’m so glad you stopped by and hope that you’re a winner! On second thought, even if you aren’t a winner of this book, you’re a winner in “my book!”

  • JViola79

    Sounds like a wonderful book & I would love to read it! Beth, know that I will be praying for you as you start this journey with cancer. May our God be with you, give your drs. wisdom & bring swift healing.

    • It really is a great book, Joanne! I hope that you pick up a copy, even if you don’t win it. Thanks so much for your kind words and prayers, my friend. They are a blessing to me!

  • Kim Adams Morgan

    My friend, please know (and I don’t think I’m speaking out of turn here) you have an entire team of prayer warriors on your side fighting for you and praying for God’s blessings and provisions during this trial. May He strengthen you and give you courage, and may you grow in wisdom as He sharpens your sword in this new path He has planned for you. God Bless. I just left my friend (a quick visit while at Allume in Greenville) who just finished treatment for the same and is doing wonderfully.

    • I know, Kim! It’s blowing my mind to think of all the wonderful people who are praying for little ol’ me! And I feel those prayers! I feel God’s grace too. I’ve really found such peace at a time when I should be freaking out! 😉 Got to be God! Thanks for stopping by and encouraging me, my friend!

  • Reading this, I’m remembering that I also got an email to review this book and totally forgot to respond! Oops! I enjoyed Kimmel’s parenting book and have been wondering how this one was…thanks for the review!

    • Ha! Yeah, I know the feeling, Elizabeth. I’ve been so behind on answering emails lately that I’m certain I’m missing someone who’s asked me to do something! Yikes! But I bet they’d still let you read it and do a review. I told them I couldn’t get one done for a couple of months and they were okay with that. Thanks for coming by and linking up this week!

  • Anna Owens

    This sounds like a wonderful book! Thank you for the review.

    • Yes, it really is a gem, Anna. I hope you check it out, whether you win it or not! Thanks for stopping by!

  • Oh Beth…how I need to hear these words today as my Michael and I are looking at an issue from very different perspectives. Grace, grace and more grace. That is my prayer. And I just read about your diagnosis and left a comment. SOOOOO praying for you.

    • I’m so glad that my words and the idea of grace is what you needed to hear today, Sheila. I can totally relate to the divergent perspectives with my hubby. We both have a strong will and a definite point of view! ha! But God’s grace has helped us time and time again when we’ve let “ourselves” get in the way! Thanks for your sweet prayers, my friend! I feel blessed!

  • why yes, i’d be thrilled to receive kimmel’s book. but oh beth . . . i just read about your recent diagnosis & my heart is aching with yours. i am so sorry that you are facing the utter brokenness of this world in this painful way. i will be praying for an abundance of grace & compassion for your journey, for both you and your husband. love & big hugs to you, my friend.

    • Hey, Tanya! So good to see you around this neck of the woods! I sure wish I could give you and everyone who comments a book! But even if you don’t win it, I hope you still check it out. It’s one of my faves! And thanks so much for your sweet words and prayers on my behalf. It means a lot to me!

      • yes, i’m def. taking a mental note. anything that’s a combo of grace & marriage & kimmel has GOT to be good! but i hadn’t heard of it, so i’m really glad you shared. heaps of hugs to you, sweet lady.

  • LuAnn Braley

    If there were no grace in marriage, I don’t think my husband and I would still be married. More than a few people around us have predicted that the marriage would not last, and even after 16 years declare that “they can’t believe we are still together”. My husband and I come from different backgrounds and have very polarized opinions on certain subjects. God has been working on both of us, that we offer grace to the other when needed, just as He does to each of us individually.

    And God is with you and your family, Beth. He’s got all the strength necessary to carry you through your difficulties. *HUGS*

    • I can really relate, LuAnn! I know my husband and I wouldn’t be married either without that beautiful and bonding grace of God. Thanks so much for stopping by and encouraging me with prayers and cyber-hugs! You’ve given me a great gift, my friend!

  • Lisa Stillman

    I could always use a lesson on grace although as much as God as shown me, I should be an expert. Praying for your healing.

    • I think we’re all in the “school of God’s grace”, Lisa! And I’m a slow learner! But this book really helped me to put some handles to the issue of just how to extend grace in marriage. Thanks so much for your prayers, my friend. 🙂

  • Oh, Beth, I missed your post on that door you would rather not walk through.. and so, now, I am sitting here praying for you, friend… lifting you up to the Healer and the Comforter and begging our Savior to carry you tenderly along this path you didn’t choose. Wish I could hug you from here.

  • Mary

    Thank you Beth! Your favorite quote is now becoming my favorite quote. It is one that I will write out and post as a reminder of our gracious God! Blessings today, everyday and may our loving Father embrace all of us today and surround us with all we need!

  • Heather Spooner

    Sounds like a wonderful book. Thank you, Beth. I am also remembering you in prayer. God bless you.

  • Billie Jo Marker

    Just stumbled across your website!!! Super excited to join this messy marriage resource! I’ve been reading marriage books all summer and would love to read this book! 🙂

  • Melinda Stanton

    Beth, I always see and feel so much grace here. I’d love the book, of course, but I appreciate your sharing it and some thoughts from it! I continue to pray for you.