Make Dating a Priority with Simple Date Idea #1

Sometimes we can let our lives become more crowded and busy than we should with kids to shuttle here and responsibilities to do there, eventually putting the priority of dating our mates on the back burner. Then we wonder why our marriage feels so lifeless and our spouse seems distant and uncaring.

Dating your Mate

If there’s one thing my husband and I always tried to avoid was letting life overtake us to the neglect of building into our relationship and marriage.

When our sons were small we dedicated Friday as our “family day,” as well designating at least one Friday night per month for a date.ย  As our boys got older and our income got a little heftier, we gained opportunities to make dating a more frequent priority.

Because I value and appreciate dating and what it’s provided for my marriage, I’m going to be sharing some simple date ideas in the weeks to come that might be that gentle nudge you need to get something like this on your calendar.

Remember a date doesn’t have to be elaborate or take up too much time. If you and your spouse love coffee, then this is a great simple date that only takes up about an hour or so. Surely, you can spare that for your marriage’s sake. And if your mate isn’t crazy about coffee, then maybe s/he would like a smoothie or a cup of tea instead.

Just check for a date and time that works for you and your spouse to chat over a nice drink and get it on your calendar. Easy peasy!ย ๐Ÿ˜‰

Simple topics for conversation might include . . .

  • Catch up on the highs and lows in your week.
  • Dream about the places you’d like to visit in the year or years to come.
  • Share what your favorite personality characteristic is of each of your kids and why.
  • If you don’t have kids, then share what you just adore about your pet(s) and why.
  • If you don’t have kids or pets, then share about the favorite personality characteristic of one of your extended family members. You get the idea.

The possibilities are endless really. It’s just a matter of getting out there and trying. Just remember . . .

[Tweet “Chatting might feel forced at first, especially if you haven’t dated in a while. #doitanyway”]

You’ll start to feel more and more comfortable after you go on more than one simple date and conversation will eventually begin to flow without much effort.

One more tip about dating as you make it more of a priorityโ€”don’t get snagged by keeping track of who plans each date. If you end up doing all of the date planning, then pat yourself on the back for being proactive and intentional! It should be a badge of honor, and not a score card for who pours into the marriage more.

Be sure to check back next week for simple date idea #2, along with more tips that hopefully will get you going in the right dating direction.


What other topics of conversation would you suggest for chatting over a nice beverage?


Accept my challenge to schedule a date this week by letting me know in the comments when you and your mate are going on one! I want to cheer you on!


Linking up with these fine blogs โ€“ย  Making Your Home Sing, Moments of Hope, Mondays @ Soul Survival, Word of God Speak, Spiritual Sundays, Mama Shares Monday, Sitting Among Friends, Faith โ€˜n Friends, Fresh Market Friday and DanceWithJesusFriday

  • Debbie Kitterman

    Even after 27+ years of marriage, I can say dating is still important. thank you for the reminders that it doesn’t have to be elaborate or cost a lot of money to have a date. I found you at #DanceWithJesus

    • Yes, I think many of us who’ve been around the block more times than we can count, know this to be so true, Debbie! I just hope the younger ones who are still in those crazy, hectic years of child-rearing stop and make this a priority too. Thanks for stopping by and encouraging me!

  • Married 40 years! We still go on weekly dates!

    • Wow, Elizabeth! You certainly don’t look like you’ve been married that long! I guess it goes to prove that dating keeps you young as well as close to your spouse! ๐Ÿ˜‰ Thanks for stopping by!

  • We love our opportunities to date, and as confirmed home bodies, when we look around and notice that somehow we’ve managed to have an evening at home alone: Downton Abbey and a pint of ice cream with two spoons. That’s all I need for a great date with my guy!

  • Liz

    We forced ourselves to go on a date Friday night. But man was it boring!!! LOL We’ve fallen into the dinner and a movie rut. I wish there was somewhere we could go to have a quiet conversation. Your prompts are great. Thanks for sharing!

    • theromanticvineyard

      This is normal for those who have gotten out of the habit of talking with no distractions. Please don’t let this discourage you! Your relationship is worth pursuing, it just takes time to change and your marriage is worth it!

  • Table Topics are great for date night. You can order them online or you can DIY. There’s a box specifically for Couples. Each card has a question on it and you take turns pulling the card, reading the question then discussing it. Lots of fun and discovery! If you don’t want to spend the money, write your own questions on strips of paper, fold each strip, toss them in a bag/container/box etc, shake it up, then pick questions randomly and discuss. Either way is a lot of fun.

  • yes and amen to putting everything and everyone else aside and focusing on each other, offering each other the grace of conversation over a good meal cooked by someone else.

    and let’s turn off our phones while we’re at it.

  • As always, your ideas are fabulous and easily implemented!

  • theromanticvineyard

    Having blogged on the importance of romancing your spouse I’ve heard all the reasons why this is difficult in many marriages. Some roll their eyes at the idea of dating, as if it’s no longer necessary. Oh, but I can attest to the contrary. Tom and I have enjoyed Monday dates for much of our 38 years of marriage. It’s not all romantically driven, sometimes its friendship driven, sometimes its spiritually driven (when I need to talk to Tom at length for his help and advice), sometimes its laughter driven when we both need to laugh out loud. Dates are the time set aside for you to be husband and wife (period). Not son, daughter, mommy, daddy, church leader, career employee, etc. neglecting this allows a place for our relationship to grow stagnant. I could go on and on, sorry. I would like to share our Date Night Questions link. It’s at the top of our blog.
    Blessings Beth!

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