How and What to Pray for Your Spouse Plus Linkup!

I was raised in a pastor’s home where prayer was an everyday occurrence, at least around the table. But oddly enough, I can’t recall ever seeing my parents pray together as a couple. That might explain why their marriage was probably messier than my own has been. And though I’m a pastor’s wife, I have […]

4 Unique Ways to Pray for God’s Comfort in Marriage And Linkup

Today I’m continuing to unpack some of the ways that I pray and prayer journal that provides the comfort I long for when my marriage and/or life wounds me deeply. And though I’m talking mainly about prayer journaling, I’m also simply talking about ways to make our prayers more conducive to sensing God’s comfort in […]

The Controller Love Style And FMTM Linkup

With Thanksgiving in the U.S. a day away, it seems appropriate to discuss the many shades of a Controller “love style!” We wouldn’t be able to get through a true Thanksgiving meal or celebration without the “Control Freak” in somebody rising to the surface like a tasty batch of homemade rolls  . . . minus […]

No Sex, Please – We’re Jedi! Guest Post And FMTM

Today we’re diverting from our series to introduce a once-a-month publication on the sex issues and struggles we face in marriage with a guest post from a dear blogging friend, Andrew Budek-Schmeisser. Andrew shares vulnerably with us today about the relentless challenges that his PTSD has brought upon his marriage and marriage bed. I don’t […]

How does listening heal when working toward reconciliation?

I’m answering in the form of a video an MM reader’s question today on the issue of listening to his wife’s pain when coming to the reconciliation table. Unfortunately, the process of reconciliation can be tough, even brutal for both parties. But it’s sort of like surgery. Whenever we need it, we submit ourselves to […]

Why I’m an ‘Avoider’ in My Marriage and FMTM

I’m what’s referred to as an “Avoider” in my “love-style.” I’ve also got a dash of “Vacillator” and a pinch of “Pleaser” in me as well. Even though it might sound like it, I’m not talking about a tasty autumn soup. 😉 What I’m referring to are some of the “love-styles” that are developed from“imprints” […]

Validation Brings Healing And Linkup

There’s a common thread that flows through most triggers and the wounds of our pasts. That thread can be found in the extremes. We feel extreme pain or emotion whenever we’ve been triggered. Or We go to an extreme on a continuum—into parenting mode or child/teenager mode—when we’ve been triggered. If we can remain in […]

Finding Healing for Your Wounds And Linkup

Today I’m continuing the series on the wounds of our past by focusing on how to bring healing to those wounds through a new spiritual and relational focus. This means delving a bit deeper into what must be done in tandem with any ongoing prayer/processing of wounds (that I’ve shared in past posts). I believe […]

Taming Triggers in Your Marriage and Life Plus WW Linkup

You’d think that after almost 29 years of marriage, my hubby and I would have tamed all of the “beasts” that arise from the moments when our wounds are triggered … but you would be wrong! 😉 I think it’s sort of like the apostle Paul’s “thorn” that God did not remove from his life […]

The Toxic Tango of Triggers And WW Linkup

Today I’m continuing to unpack more in our series about the wounds of our pasts by sharing another one of my triggers, as well as how that impacts and often serves to trigger my husband in a certain way. I’m sharing this because … [Tweet “We most often experience our triggers in the closeness and […]