How Satan Attacks Marriage Using This Tempting Direction (Linkup)

I thought it appropriate to start a new series on the attacks of Satan on marriage during a month that is traditionally associated with spooks, spirits and scary things. I know of many—Christ-followers included—who never consider the relevance or real threat that Satan and his demons pose against our marriages. I want to state for […]

The ABC’s of How to Forgive a Spouse And Linkup

One of the gusty winds people often feel in marriage has to do with a heart growing cold out of a need to forgive a mate. I was there in that frigid place many years ago and still find myself tempted to return to that icy and unforgiving place whenever my husband hurts me. Because […]

First Step to Get Your Heart Right in a Messy Marriage And Linkup

The continual mending of my messy marriage can be traced back to one foundational shift in my life that created a cascade of other important and healing choices. Ultimately this had everything to do with my heart in relation to God. So with that in mind, I’m going to begin a new series that will […]

How does listening heal when working toward reconciliation?

I’m answering in the form of a video an MM reader’s question today on the issue of listening to his wife’s pain when coming to the reconciliation table. Unfortunately, the process of reconciliation can be tough, even brutal for both parties. But it’s sort of like surgery. Whenever we need it, we submit ourselves to […]

Is Your Love for Your Mate Failing?

Persevering in life and in certain painful seasons of marriage can feel so very overwhelming and discouraging, especially when the pain lingers for an extended time. We can feel helpless and confused about what to do next. Even worse we can feel like we have nothing left to give, nor want to give—perhaps because we […]

Lessons on Love in Marriage

I’ve yet to attend a wedding where the 1 Corinthians 13 passage on “love” was not quoted by some well-meaning clergyman in a wedding. Unfortunately . . . [Tweet “The overuse of this passage has made these powerful truths ring hollow and cliché. 1 Cor. 13”] But if we scrutinize and take the truths explained […]

What I Learned from a Fight with My Hubby And Linkup

Toward the end of my month-long reorganizing, repairing and purging of my house in June, my husband and I had an argument. Mind you, it wasn’t related to the hard work that we were doing on the house. But it was a doozy of a misunderstanding on both our parts. I won’t go into all […]

Purging Pride And Linkup is Back!

As many of you know, my hubby Gary and I have wanted to get our house ready to put on the market for quite sometime (we’re empty-nesters who desperately need to downsize). So I pulled away from “everything”—including blogging—for the month of June to get our house in shape for that big day that I […]

Settling this Matter Matters

I spend a lot of time here at Messy Marriage giving practical helps and tools for dealing with the messes in marriage, but the bottom line is that none of that matters if you don’t settle one thing! [Tweet “The one thing you must settle is Christ and what He did for you and me. […]

How Enabling Your Mate Controls ‘You’

I want to discuss one more way that our mates can sometimes control us … through the ever-tempting avenue of enabling them. The reason I say this is “tempting” is probably because I feel this draw as a woman and mother perhaps a bit more than men generally do. Enabling actually springs up from a […]