Is it Always Your Fault?

Do you feel like “the problem” spouse? by Chris Owens I know about this troubling dynamic, because I was the one blaming my spouse for the fault in our marriage—both verbally and in my head. I couldn’t escape the belief that my husband, Gary, was the problem! And if I could just “fix” him or […]

Does What I Feel Really Matter?

Today’s article is another “Share Your Story” contribution from blogger, Jennifer of Finding Fruit  cristee 12 (Flickr) It started weeks ago, a quick harsh word said to me. The word itself was not harsh, I don’t even remember what it was. But my body jumped up as if burned. I walked away not wanting to […]

Consumed with Making My Spouse Perfect

Back some 25 years ago, I didn’t marry the man that I now call my husband. No, I haven’t gotten a divorce and remarried a different man. I simply married the man I believed would change to suit my preferences and ideals. In hindsight, I can clearly see that was the … Wrong Approach!    […]

The Anatomy of Bitterness

I took an Anatomy class in college. BIG.MIS.TAKE First of all, with the help of my lab partner, I had to skin a cat. Ewww! Then I had to familiarize myself so thoroughly with every in and out (organs, bones, muscles, nerves) of that sad cat that I had formaldehyde-filled dreams at night! But what […]

Miserable in Marriage

Recently, I had a blog reader point out that my post, “Mess-Maker #1 – My Marriage Should Make Me Happy,” deals with the ineffective pursuit of happiness, but doesn’t address the person who is miserable in his or her marriage. After all, you’d think that a blog named Messy Marriage would directly address the person […]

My Messy Messages

Today we’re linked to Chrysalis, exploring the topic of communication –  Just the other day I decided to “communicate” my displeasure with something my husband had said earlier to me, by using sarcasm to strike back at him. Honestly, I thought it would get my message across in a “funny” way. After all, everybody loves a […]