24 Ways to Show and Grow in Grace in Your Life and Marriage

Recently I’ve been sharing about my one word for 2018—“grace!” But sharing about it versus living it out is so much easier to say than do. That’s why I really want to nail it down biblically, so that I increase my tendency to be gracious in every circumstance—including and especially in my marriage. My hope […]

Giving Grace When it’s Hard and Goes Unnoticed

One of the hardest challenges of living out grace in my marriage has and continues to be extending grace (my “one word”) when it has gone unnoticed or does not get returned. I think that’s because positives can easily go under the radar for most everyone—especially and including by me! 😉 The negatives, the bad […]

5 ‘Little Foxes’ that Damage a Marriage by Kelly R. Baker

Have you heard of the allegorical foxes that spoil the vine? My mother used to quote Song of Songs 2:15 to my brother and me growing up, as part of teaching us how to treat people. She continued to remind me of this verse when my husband Justin and I started butting heads early on […]

How Long Should I Extend Grace in Marriage? And Linkup

I ended last week’s post in the series, The Many Faces of Grace, with this question: When is it unhealthy or “enabling” to overlook an insult or sin in my spouse (or other offender)? I think the questions to consider in this kind of situation are: Is it destructive to one or more relationships? (Creating […]

Why the Habit of Studying the Bible Can Make Marriage Messier And Linkup

Back in the early days of my marriage—when it was at its messiest—I faithfully made time for God and His word. It seems like this sacred habit would’ve kept my marriage from sliding into a ditch, so to speak. Unfortunately, that wasn’t the case. Therefore, it might seem counterintuitive for me to encourage you to […]

How My Hubby Was There for Me in My Pain And FMTM

Today I want to share a post that brags just a bit about my husband—pointing out how he recently was there for me in my pain. To understand the significance of this lesson he’s learned in our marriage, you have to know where he’s come from in comparison to where he is now. Years ago, […]

Are You Pushing or Encouraging Your Mate Spiritually?

Most of you know that I’m a pastor’s wife, but that doesn’t mean I’m not guilty of pushing my hubby spiritually when it seems like he’s not pursuing God with the same intensity as I am. Of course, sometimes he feels that way about me too. 😉 We all go through seasons when our spiritual […]

Encourage Conversation with Disengaged Spouse FMTM

Even though my hubby’s more of an extrovert than I am, he still struggles to fully engage in a deep conversation with me. That’s because it’s easy for an extrovert to remain on the surface. Oh sure, they love to talk! They’re ever scanning a crowd for an opportunity to strike up a conversation, especially […]

Giving Up on Your Marriage?

I started blogging (another blog) back in Feb. 2009, and have been blogging at Messy Marriage since October 2010, so it feels like quite a long journey in many ways. For the record . . . I’ve wanted to give up on this blogging endeavor many times! I’ve felt like it’s not worth it more […]

My Husband’s View on Spiritual Leadership

I’m excited to add a new installment to my “Pick Hubby’s Brain” video series this week. We’ve had some camera issues (and quite frankly, are still having some issues to iron out) but am happy to offer some food for thought from my wise and witty hubby on the sticky subject of spiritual leadership. I […]