Finding Healing for Your Wounds And Linkup

Today I’m continuing the series on the wounds of our past by focusing on how to bring healing to those wounds through a new spiritual and relational focus. This means delving a bit deeper into what must be done in tandem with any ongoing prayer/processing of wounds (that I’ve shared in past posts). I believe […]

The Childhood Wound of Neglect And WW Linkup

I’ve been a bit surprised by the amount of interest in this series on the wounds of our past, but definitely not shocked. I think this is an area that many couples struggle with and can relate to—realizing it brings with it much messiness and misery in marriage. The first step I want to take […]

Resisting God because You Feel Pressured?

This week I’m tackling another way we let our spouses control us … “Resisting spiritual pursuits because your spouse is cramming them down your throat.” The spouse who has been pressured by his/her spouse in this way often “reacts” rather than “responds” to this situation. The distinction is an important one. A “reaction” is letting […]

‘Fix’-ated on Changing Your Mate?

Today we continue to unpack the many subtle ways our spouses can control us by talking today about the temptation to try to “fix” or change our spouse because he/she doesn’t do his/her part or do it correctly. This is very similar to the victim-mentality post I wrote about recently, but the emphasis is on […]

For the Wife Who Feels Empty in Marriage – Guest Post and Linkup!

Today we are honored to have our bloggy friend Ifeoma Samuel sharing a guest post and hosting Wedded Wednesday! I hope you’ll check out her blog – Purposeful and Meaningful as well as making her feel welcome with lots of comments below! Happily married to a loving man, blessed with a daughter—everything seemed to be […]

The Allure of the Illegitimate in Marriage

Today I’m continuing to unpack another way we can let our spouses control us with – “Choosing to have an affair or to look at pornography because you believe you’ve been deprived of ‘whatever’ in your marriage.” I have a sneaking suspicion that the spouses who need this message the most are not going to […]

5 Ways Your Spouse Can Control You

I’m beginning a new series on Sundays that will unpack five ways that we are prone to let our spouses control us. FYI … I’ll still be posting videos on upcoming Sundays, just not as often.  If you’ve been married for any length of time, it is so easy to fall into these five unhealthy […]

10 Things You Won’t See Me Post on Facebook

The holidays can be a really depressing time for many people and hard on many marriages. Not only are issues related to grief heightened at holiday times, but the stress and expectations level is usually higher than any other time of year. But what I think makes matters worse is the impact of Facebook. Don’t […]

12 Ways Being Vulnerable Can Ruin Your Marriage

If you have been around Messy Marriage for any length of time, you know that I am a BIG proponent of vulnerability. Don’t get me wrong … I’m not flip-flopping on the issue of being vulnerable with who we are with our mates. That’s something we all should strive for! I just know that … […]