6 Motivators for Improving Your Love Language Deficit

No one would argue that speaking our mate’s love languages can really improve the feeling of love in our marriages. But what do we do when our love languages conflict and change over time? And more importantly, what are the motivators for improving how often and how much we speak our mate’s love language in […]

75 Ways to Speak Your Mate’s Love Language

Some people really dislike Valentines Day because they feel it’s an over-commercialized holiday that obligates them to buy and give something special to their significant other. I, for one, do not take that view. I’m grateful for holidays that remind me to do what really matters in my marriage and life—even though I should be […]

8 Red Flags That Might Mean Your Spouse is Having an Affair

Here at Messy Marriage I always try to encourage spouses to persevere in their marriages with the help of the Lord, even though sometimes a major problem, like an affair, can rock a marriage to its core. If this is, or might be, your situation, my hope is that you aren’t immediately running for a […]

How Your Marriage Can Relieve Stress During the Holidays

I don’t know about you, but most couples often feel overwhelmed and stressed to.the.max by the demands that Christmas can bring. With that in mind, I’d like to share some principles from Scripture that can lessen our stress with love—“married love” to be precise. I will be basing my thoughts on one day’s notes taken […]

Increase Good Chemistry of Love in Marriage (And Linkup)

I’m continuing to unpack another lesson in my “Back to School” series by discussing today how I gained back the “chemistry” or feelings of love that had cooled when my marriage was at its messiest. I learned the hard way that what I do drastically impacts the way I feel in my marriage. Let me […]

4 Myths Every New Bride Should Know About Sex Plus Giveaway and Linkup

Today I’m excited to have my good bloggy friend Ngina Otiende as my guest, offering her perspective about some of the myths new brides cling to regarding sex, while countering them with the truths she’s discovered. And even though this is for the new bride, I think every wife out there can find valuable truth […]

No Sex, Please – We’re Jedi! Guest Post And FMTM

Today we’re diverting from our series to introduce a once-a-month publication on the sex issues and struggles we face in marriage with a guest post from a dear blogging friend, Andrew Budek-Schmeisser. Andrew shares vulnerably with us today about the relentless challenges that his PTSD has brought upon his marriage and marriage bed. I don’t […]

The Allure of the Illegitimate in Marriage

Today I’m continuing to unpack another way we can let our spouses control us with – “Choosing to have an affair or to look at pornography because you believe you’ve been deprived of ‘whatever’ in your marriage.” I have a sneaking suspicion that the spouses who need this message the most are not going to […]

12 Ways Being Vulnerable Can Ruin Your Marriage

If you have been around Messy Marriage for any length of time, you know that I am a BIG proponent of vulnerability. Don’t get me wrong … I’m not flip-flopping on the issue of being vulnerable with who we are with our mates. That’s something we all should strive for! I just know that … […]

“9 Thoughts that Can Change Your Marriage” Giveaway and Linkup

I was excited to receive and read Sheila Gregoire’s latest marriage book, 9 Thoughts That Can Change Your Marriage. If you don’t know Sheila, then you need to get to know her! She blogs at To Love, Honor and Vacuum and in her characteristic transparent and witty style, she used 9 pat answers as a […]