Learning the Hard Way

If you are in a messy marriage, you may feel like, “When are things going to get easier?” Maybe you’ve gone to counseling, you’ve prayed and prayed for your marriage, you’ve worked on communicating better with your spouse, you’ve read marriage book after marriage book, and next to nothing ever happens or changes for the […]

The Secret to Contentment

I remember the realization like it was yesterday. My husband and I were emerging out of a long, difficult period into a promising new venture. I was walking high and so excited for what this adventure might bring our way. I was determined and hopeful that this new pathway was going to usher in our […]

How to Motivate Your Spouse

If there’s one thing I’ve learned from God through the years, He loves paradoxes. He is strong in our weakness (2 Cor. 12:9). To the wise, His ways are foolishness (1 Cor. 1:18).   But God’s love of paradox is never more obvious than in the way He wants us to love. You know … “The […]

How My Marriage Ended in a Dog Fight

Cheyenne – “The Culprit” It all began when my husband and I were trying to decide how to deal with a problem our dog was having at night—barking and whining. We started out discussing the matter and ended with a full-blown “dog fight.” My husband felt disrespected that I would not listen to his suggestions. […]

Falling Forward

Sometimes I let the doubts about who I am—messiness and all—get me down. I wonder, How can I ever lead others into healing and wholeness in marriage or life, if I don’t have it all together myself?   The reality is that very often I don’t feel qualified. I don’t feel capable. I don’t feel […]

Do You Really Want to Get Well?

I don’t know about you, but sometimes I like the perks that come with being sick. When you’re sick, you usually … Don’t have to do your daily responsibilities. Have someone to take care of your many needs. Are given more understanding and concern from those who are healthy. Can nestle down into some comfy […]

Where to Find the Perfect Christmas Gift

Christmas can be a time of joy and laughter … But for many couples and families, it is a time of stress, fighting and over-extending. Not only do you have the pressures of buying fun and frugal Christmas presents for all of your family and friends, but you also have the pressures of cooking, cleaning, […]


Written by Stacey Micklevitz  Messy Marriage Team Member What comes to mind when you think of the word “surrender”? Do you imagine a war-torn white flag waving atop a weather-beaten stick? Or a prisoner, head hung in shame with hands shackled behind the back? What good comes from surrender? Merriam-Webster.com defines surrender this way: “to […]

Opposites Repel

Written by – Stacey Micklevitz Wait … WHAT?  No, opposites attract. Right?  Right! . . . At first.  See, Bryan is my opposite in nearly every way. I’m very structured; he’s laid back. I’m a tad high-strung; he’s laid back. I’m very detail-oriented; he’s, well … laid back. Have I mentioned that he is rather […]

Marriage Mistake #8 – Let My Spouse’s Bad Behavior Control Mine

The Mistaken Game My husband and I have had a game that we carried from our childhood into our marriage. No, we don’t play “Ken and Barbie” into all hours of the night, nor do we hold “who can belch the loudest?” contests either! You see, it’s the age old game of “Tit for Tat.” […]