Back in the early days of my marriage—when it was at its messiest—I faithfully made time for God and His word. It seems like this sacred habit would’ve kept my marriage from sliding into a ditch, so to speak.
Unfortunately, that wasn’t the case.
Therefore, it might seem counterintuitive for me to encourage you to make studying God’s word your daily habit in an effort to heal and strengthen your marriage—though that’s where I’m eventually headed. 😉
In fact, not only did this spiritual discipline not keep my marriage from being messy, I might even go so far as to say that it actually increased the messiness of my marriage for a time.
Yep, there was something of a correlation between the messiness of my marriage and how much I pursued time with God!
What are my reasons for saying this?
1. Habits are nothing more than repeated practices.
If I’m only reading God’s word and praying for the sake of reinforcing (in my mind) my husband’s guilt, I miss the point of the Spirit’s indwelling of my own heart. My motives for reading and my willingness to listen and apply what God teaches ME are essential to making my spiritual disciplines effective. Sadly, I was often guilty of this back in the day.
2. Some good habits take years, if not decades, to bear fruit in our lives.
I’m not saying that when I studied God’s word and prayed in those early days of my marriage, God didn’t bring any fruit out of that in my life and marriage. He did. It just wasn’t as bountiful and strong as it is now. And sometimes I didn’t see the growth that was really taking place in my heart, rather than in my marriage.
Ultimately, God’s refinement of my heart through my spiritual disciplines took (and takes) time. We have to accept that God is not interested in quick fixes.
Which brings me to another reason . . .
3. God uses the dry and messy moments in marriage to teach us to wait on Him.
Therefore our sacred habits, no matter how consistent or effective, requires that you and I view our time with the Lord as an opportunity to go slow and know Him before we grow in Him.
My final reason . . .
4. Satan sees our sacred habit and wants to discourage us in that pursuit.
If there’s anything that chaps the side of the Evil one, it’s seeing a believer desperately and continually pursuing God and His word. You and I can expect that we will face hindrances, obstacles and painful struggles all along the way—especially when we are carving out the habit of seeking God and His word in an effort to strengthen our marriages.
Now, with all of that said, carving out time to study God’s word is, in my opinion, absolutely one of the first steps toward bringing healing and health to a messy marriage!
It’s an investment that in time will bring rich dividends, not only to your marriage, but to your life!
From my vantage point, establishing a sacred habit is one of the hardest things for people to do, probably because of all of these reasons and more! So I want to share some practical and biblical insights next week that can ignite a fire in your heart—making this habit your daily priority, which can and will in time bring healing to the hurts of your marriage.
What has been your biggest challenge in creating the habit of studying God’s Word in your life?
What has made a difference in your ability to establish it?
You’ll find a “wealth” of information and resources for financial insight and support at Power Over Life, where you’ll also find a quote from me, along with quotes from many other marriage experts. We’re sharing how important it is to deal proactively with your finances in marriage. So if that’s a need in your marriage or life, I hope you’ll check them out. 🙂
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