Will you soothe my mood? SJT Video

Crooked CommunicationEver give yourself permission to vent with your spouse? Well, I certainly do and have!

In my latest “Sloppy Joe Time” video, I share what I’m trying to get my spouse to do when I vent (yes, that means “messy manipulation” is present!). And I share the three positive strategies I’m using to turn that “Titanic failure” around. I hope you’ll click on the video below to find out just what those strategies are!

 

I’d love it if you’d tweet these fun reminders from our video this week . . .

What are some of your “sloppy reasons” for allowing yourself to vent on your mate?

 

How have you learned to communicate your need for comfort in a healthy way?

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If you’d like to view the video at Messy Marriage’s Youtube channel or view some of the other Sloppy Joe Time videos, click here. And I’d love it if you’d subscribe to the channel while you’re there!


 

Linking up with – Marriage Mondays, The Weekend Brew, Faith and Friends, Making Your Home SingMondays @ Soul Survival,  Sunday Stillness,  Sharing His Beauty, Spiritual Sundays and  Playdates with God

 

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  • Since I live with chronic pain, I can get a ‘bit” (understatement alert!) grouchy. My husband and I have found if I just communicate that the pain is nearing the endurance level it makes such a difference. Sometimes just saying it dissipates the grounchies. And when it doesn’t, RB knows not to take my crooked communication personally. It works for us…he’s a special man.

    • Yes, Pamela, I feel your pain! I have RA and that factors in quite a bit to my tendency to vent. I’m learning, like you, to be honest with how I’m feeling, instead of trying to power through it and then finding I’m failing miserably at being kind! It truly does help to clue our hubbies in on the problem. I’m so glad you have a hubby that’s so understanding, my friend! And thanks for coming by to encourage me!

  • Mary

    Great video and love your honesty today. Making the comment underneath that you will be learning these strategies for the rest of your life. I certainly understand that. Hearing more about you and your husband just convicts me more that I want to meet both of you. Love having you at The Weekend Brew. Hope your week is wonderful. Love you friend!

    • Yes, it’s something we all must accept–that we are life-long learners, no matter how much “book-learning” we gain or experiences we work through, Mary. When I think I’ve “arrived” is the moment, I will have FAR to go! 😉 I’d love to meet you in person, Mary. In fact, my hubby and I will be taking a vacation to Virginia in the fall. I know you live in Ohio, but if you’re close to Louisville, KY or Cincinnati, we could maybe make a date to meet at a coffee shop. But if it’s too far off the beaten path for you, I’m certain there will be another trip up that way for us. We often go to conferences and on vacations that take us all over the US. Have a wonderful Mother’s Day!

  • I laugh at the visual of thinking I’m inviting my husband to hug the grizzly bear in the corner. 🙂 I definitely need to pray more during our conflicts and ask Jeff later what *I* can do differently versus telling him what *he* can do differently. {ouch} Apologies are always, always good! Thanks, Beth. You’re such an encourager.

    • Oh yes, Lisa, it does sound funny, but it’s not very funny in the moment! ha! Yes, prayer during the conflict is what has gotten me out of the “messy marriage years” to ones that aren’t quite so messy and much more redeemed. And yes, taking personal responsibility is a step of faith. We do what is our part and that faith in the unseen in our mates often ignites change for the better in their hearts as well. Thanks so much for your sweet words, my friend and I hope you have a great Mother’s Day!

  • I love my sloppy Joe time friend. This is good stuff. Prayer, communication and apology/confession. This is the stuff great, Godly marriages are made of! I too have gotten lost in the Schroeder black hole of crazy every now and then. But it is what it is. You learn from it and move forward and pour out lots of grace on yourself, and another person who needs it. [I will road trip and steal that chevron mug one of these days, don’t say you haven’t been warned.] 🙂 🙂 🙂 xoxo

    • Thank you, Nicki! I am honored that you would find this helpful and encouraging. Oh, you have a “black hole” too? 😉 I think it comes with the territory of marriage. Thankfully we have a mighty God who can pull us out of the abyss and back into His redeemed landscape.

      You really do need to make that road trip, my friend! I will gladly let you drink out of my chevron cup, but there’s no way I’m letting you get out the door without a pat down, my dear! Lol! I got mine at Hobby Lobby and sadly they don’t carry it anymore. I even looked on their website to see if I could order an extra. They just don’t recognize the popularity of that lovely design, do they?? Hugs to you!